


i'll run to your side when your heart is bleedin'

by kimcastijo



Category: Mission: Impossible (Movies)
Genre: (but thats because im not great at writing yet), Alternate Universe, Angst and Feels, Angst and Humor, Attempt at Humor, Fake Relationship, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Possibly Out of Character, Short & Sweet, Timeline What Timeline
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-26
Updated: 2019-01-26
Packaged: 2019-10-16 06:50:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17544773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kimcastijo/pseuds/kimcastijo
Summary: Benji Dunn - your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to keep Ethan Hunt's fake relationship alive and keep your love for him under wraps.





	i'll run to your side when your heart is bleedin'

**Author's Note:**

> hello people of the Benji Dunn/Ethan Hunt fandom! a few days ago i realized that there is a woefully small amount of fan-fiction for this adorable couple so i'm trying to remedy that :-) this is my first Mission Impossible fan-fiction so no promises that it'll be good or completely in character, especially when it comes to Ethan (he's so hard to write? whereas Benji writes himself?) but i'm trying! 
> 
> anyways this is supposed to take place AFTER MI:6, but the flashback takes place somewhere between the end of MI:3 and MI:4 :*
> 
> also, constructive criticism is always welcome :-)

"Son of a fuck!"

 

Benji grumbled in pure annoyance at the fact that his pet project was taking so god damn long to complete. Sure, he never really had time to focus on it so the process was very slow, but he couldn't believe that it was taking him more than a few weeks to finish updating the IMF voice changing program.

 

He had decided to stay a bit later at the office to finish up some post-mission paperwork and, while that was processing, work on his buggering project. In his defense, he thought it would take an hour tops but he had been sitting in his stupid office chair for at least three hours. By then, everyone had slowly filtered out, leaving Benji with his task and the janitors. They didn't acknowledge him anyways so he continued tinkering in relative peace.

 

On the last full-team mission to Andorra la Vella, a small yet major city located in the Pyrenees mountains, Benji had been mind-numbingly bored and felt like pestering Luther. One of his favorite pastimes was bothering the older agent by asking him questions about past exploits such as: "Luther, what did you do to get disavowed?", "Luther, what illegal activities did you get up to before you became a hero?", or "Luther, what did you think when you met Ethan? Was he just as alien-like back then or is that just a me thing?".

 

Usually by the third or fourth question, Luther's deep rumbling voice would snap at him to go away (in much more colorful terms) and he would turn away to continue doing whatever it was that Luther did in his free time. Seriously, that dude needs to get a life.

 

_Says the man who is so bored that he'd rather get threatened with bodily harm than find something else to do_ , the little voice in his subconscious supplied. Benji mentally rolled his eyes at this little voice and squashed it down, focusing further on the project before him.

 

**Anyways** , Benji sneered at his mental voice for taking him off track, on the last mission Luther told the group about that time when the world was almost going to shite and the team had to scramble to get a voice match on Owen Davian. Ethan had to stall Davian's mountain of a body guard by coughing up a lung while Declan hid behind the bathroom door with Davian's passed out body.

 

As Luther was recalling the stressful moment he could barely breathe from how hard he was laughing. His eyes were almost completely closed and tears stained his cheeks. When he finally calmed down enough to speak again, he would just start laughing all over again.

 

The whole team was laughing right alongside the older man. It seemed laughing off harrowing experiences was the only way that they could get over them these days.

 

"Why didn't the twit just nod? I'm sure Davian's bodyguard wouldn't be smart enough to realize that his boss was being impersonated!", Benji was crying and holding his stomach as he managed to punch out the question. Seriously, did Ethan get off on making situations more stressful for himself?

 

Suddenly he was the only one still laughing, tears streaming down his reddened cheeks. He noticed the team was staring behind him and Zheng had looked at him pointedly as if to say "are you a fucking idiot?". He sobered up enough to turn around and see the man of the hour standing in the doorway with his arms crossed.

 

Ethan wasn't frowning, but then again when did the man ever express an emotion besides schooled nonchalance? He was wearing a pair of blue jeans that hugged his legs, packed with muscle from the years of field work. On top he was wearing a simple light-grey henley with the first button undone and his hair styled to perfection despite them being in the middle of the fucking Pyrenees mountains. He had filled out nicely since the events with Davian, but he still looked a little gaunt from the whole ordeal. While Julia has escaped with her life intact, Benji hadn't seen the gorgeous woman since then and Ethan had thrown himself further into missions.

 

He wasn't close enough to Ethan to warrant a barrage of questions about his estranged wife, and he wasn't even sure if he wanted to know the answer to the many questions swirling around his head. Although Benji had aided the man during the mission (he was still willing to share a jail cell), the two hadn't gotten any closer. Sure, he had been placed onto their team but he knew that he would never be as close to Ethan as Luther was. The two had a friendship that spanned years and even he didn't speak to Ethan about personal matters

 

The rest of the team, including Luther, were quiet but Benji soldiered on like the proverbial Bull in a China shop.

 

"How's the lung mate?", Benji joked with an easy smile.

 

Ethan hadn't budged a centimeter from his spot in the arched doorway and simply quirked a frustratingly perfect eyebrow. He hoped it was in a sincerely questioningly way rather than a 'did this idiot just ask me a question as stupid as that?' way.

 

Ethan still had an unreadable expression on his face and Benji had felt himself growing increasingly uncomfortable under the unrelenting stare.

 

The rest of the team, those dickheads, had turned around to murmur amongst themselves and left Benji to clean up whatever mess he had just made. He truly hoped Ethan wasn't planning on ripping his head off for making fun of him. He didn't seem like the type to do that, but the man was unpredictable; that's what made him so successful against enemies.

 

Benji internally winced as the silence stretched further and decided to open his idiot mouth again and let whatever was in there tumble out.

 

"Listen, mate, I promise to make you a voice match program that's ten times faster than this piece of trash. Just you wait, you'll never have to injure your lungs again with Benji around!", he cheerfully assured the older man and got up from the common room. He seriously needed to get away from his boss (could he be considered his boss, though?) before he said something even stupider.

 

Benji had always been somewhat nervous around Ethan. It was something about the way that he carried himself, as though he were always in a different universe, body keyed up and ready to go at a moment's notice. He never relaxed enough to reintegrate back into the world after missions.

 

While Benji had only known the other agent for a few months after the Davian fiasco, he was a pretty observant person. He was able to tell that the other man was far from okay: his once fitted tee shirts were a smidge baggier, his ever present eye bags seemed a tad more aggressive, and his usually glossy hair had laid on top of his head like a dead squirrel. In general, the man looked like shite.

 

That innocuous conversation was almost 7 years ago.

 

The original team Benji had been placed on had dissolved and reformed itself so many times that he had stopped trying to count. Of course he made sure to befriend his teammates but he knew that at one point or another he would be unceremoniously thrown into another team and have to start the process all over again. The only constant he had was Ethan.

 

No matter where Benji went, Ethan was bound to be there in some capacity. His natural coconut shampoo. His gentle smiles. His soft chuckles. His brooding face.

 

Ethan's once closed off attitude had blossomed into a more open one, with the two men able to joke around together about anything under the sun. Although Benji loved Luther with his entire being, the older man simply didn't have the bond that he shared with Ethan.

 

"Listen here you bloody idiot, you don't start working soon I'll have to break out the big guns.", he hissed at his laptop screen, mainly to himself.

 

Why the fuck wasn't he able to figure out this damn program? Was he really losing his touch in his old age?

 

"Woah there, Benj. I don't think threatening a piece of equipment will make it work any faster."

 

Benji made an undignified squeak which he would deny until the day he died and spun around in his uncomfortable office chair.

 

Just like in his memory, Ethan was leaning in the doorway of Benji's office with his arms crossed. However this time there was an easy smile splayed across his handsome face. Ethan's all-consuming icy blue eyes were looking at Benji with some unknown emotion, but he liked to tell himself he was happy to see the tech guru (though he didn't want to get his hopes up).

 

Oh yeah, during those long 7 years Benji had fallen wholly, head-over-heels, embarrassingly in love with the very unattainable Ethan Hunt. The world works in mysterious ways huh? The man he had a severe crush on (and extremely inconvenient hero worship tendencies toward) became one of, if not his most, cherished friend. And he somehow fell in love. How fun.

 

Benji didn't quite know when he fell in love with Ethan. Was it during the quiet nights on missions, when Ethan would listen to him speak animatedly about the latest episode of Parks and Recreation, so clearly pretending to be paying attention but really dozing off? Was it during their daily morning coffee ritual when he would pull a face at the fact that Ethan drank his coffee disgustingly black accompanied by a croissant from the common room that looked to be a day or so old? Was it when Ethan would make smart remarks behind his newspaper about his giant mug that said 'eat a giant bag of dicks' (a going-away present from his tech buddies) in scrawling letters that contained his ridiculously obscure tea of the day?

 

Whenever it happened, it made his job that much more difficult. As it turned out, having a crush-that-leaned-towards-love on your partner who liked to throw himself in the middle of danger was incredibly stressful for the heart. He was pretty sure that the team's final altercation with Solomon Lane had proved how fucking fool hardy Ethan was when he was determined to save the world. Of course Benji was grateful that there was a man of Ethan's caliber looking out for everyone but dammit shouldn't he look out for himself as well?

 

Benji touched his neck at the memory of hanging up there in those rafters, praying to whoever was listening that Ethan manage to get the detonator and eviscerate Walker while he was at it. It felt strange for his last thoughts to be on Ethan and wondering if he was safe, but he seemed to be all he thought of so, in hindsight, it kind of made sense.

 

"Earth to Benj? What's going on up there?", Ethan's slightly worried voice filled the silence only accompanied by the soft whirring of Benji's computer which, by the way, still wasn't running his program. Bugger.

 

He smiled up at the concern in Ethan's voice and stood up, allowing his back to pop in multiple places from disuse.

 

"Other than wondering if I'm going through the early stages of dementia? Not much. What about you, super soldier? How are your ribs? I know that Julia cleared you for active duty but you must hurt like a bitch.", Benji winced at the memory of seeing Ethan bandaged up in the makeshift hospital of Kashmir.

 

He simply grinned at Benji's words and uncrossed his arms, moving out of the doorway and walking towards his messy desk.

 

It had only been a few weeks since they finished up with Lane, so Benji's office was still in a state of complete disarray.

 

"Oh yeah, I keep finding bruises in places I wasn't even sure I could bruise. Jules put me on some heavy medication, though, so I'm not in too much pain."

 

He trailed off and leaned against the desk, crossing his arms once more just staring at Benji who was still trying to work out a kink in his back.

 

"Mind telling me why you decided to stay in the states over the holidays? I was almost positive you'd jump at the chance to visit London when you could actually enjoy yourself.", Ethan sounded slightly bitter by the end of his comment and looked at him expectantly.

 

Benji prayed once more that Ethan wasn't hiding some telepathic powers because he had been dreading answering this question. He wasn't even sure of the answer himself, really. He just knew that he didn't want his family to hear his loud whimpers in the dead of night when he had his nightmares.

 

Like Ethan, nightmares were a constant fixture of life.

 

Instead, he shrugged nonchalantly and eased himself back into the extremely uncomfortable chair.

 

"You know, a little bit of this and a little bit of that. Plus, I wanted to finish this program I've been working on for the past few weeks. I meant to stay for an hour but that turned into a few hours so here I am. Mind telling me why you're still here?" 

Over the years, Benji had learned that deflecting conversation was a prized skill, and he had been using it with his friend on an increasingly regular basis. By now he was like a god damn word-ninja slash tech wizard.

 

At this line of conversation the normally confident agent smiled sheepishly.

 

"I was supposed to fly out and meet my mother and uncle Don in Greece but she expected me to show up with the partner I've been telling her so much about, so I cancelled. I was on my way to call her but I saw your light was still on and decided to investigate like the good little super soldier that I am."

 

Benji had never felt himself go through so many emotions at once. Partner? Mother? If he had a partner why did he cancel?

 

Swallowing around his sudden cotton mouth, Benji tried for casual.

 

"Oh, partner? Why'd you cancel?", he was fiddling with the program once more in an effort to look unaffected. However, under the mask Benji was feeling sick.

 

If Ethan had a partner then that's completely fine (not). Benji would be happy for his friend dammit. Just because it wasn't he who was going to Greece to meet Ethan's family doesn't mean he shouldn't be supportive.

 

Ethan's cheeks began to flush and he looked away as if he were about to admit something embarrassing.

 

"Well, uh I told her that I was casually talking to a man I met through work, but that was seven months ago.", at this point Ethan had a pained look on his face. "The lie snowballed to the point where I'm not sure I can keep it up. She invited my 'boyfriend' to Christmas with the family and I can't show up empty handed so I decided I wouldn't go. I can just say that I got called away on a last minute mission.", he finished and motioned with his hands lamely.

 

Okay so: 1) Ethan was not dating anyone. 2) This imaginary partner was a 'HE'. And 3) he was giving up Christmas with his family because he was embarrassed! Could the man get any more charming?

 

As if on cue, Benji's word vomit decided to rear its ugly sodding head.

 

**"Why don't I go with you?"**


End file.
